The Ends of Being and Ideal Grace

Magpapakabait na ko. Eto kasi yun eh. Eto yung ayokong masira. Eto yung hindi ko kayang i-risk. Never in a thousand years ko to iririsk just because of a reason so self-serving. /*May picture dapat kasama to eh. */
-Excerpt from my facebook account (May 13, 2011)


Still looking for that picture. I think no one posted it. That's sad coz that would be something I'd hold on to. 


I've come to accept that right now, this happy happy friendship  is all that I've got, all that I hope for. I haven't stop dreaming that maybe we could be something more but I've stopped acting on my delusions. We'd laugh, we'd study, we'd work together. We'd still walk beside each other, laze around hoping for the prof to never enter the door. And that's all that we'd so happily be. I simply cannot allow myself to be so besotted by his  kind ways. You always want what you cant have. But you can always choose to stop wanting it. 


"Sana ako ako nalang. Sana ako parin. Sana ako nalang ulit"
-Basha, One More Chance


Oh here we go again. ikaw nalang. ikaw parin naman. At ikaw nalang talaga ulit. Yeah, I think if my friends have a choice, they'd hit me in the head, run me over by a truck and fill me with enough Tanduay Ice to induce partial amnesia. Oh great hahaha. It's May 22 today. It's my self-proclaimed "monthsary". 28 months of sheer martyrdom. After 8 more months, maybe you can ask me for a miracle then I can be beatified. :D